Saturday, April 28, 2012
As I have considered posting after all of these lost months, I have suffered from a bit of...guilt! Seriously...I feel like I have abandoned an old friend when they needed me the most. It's weird.
It's time now to move forward, let go of the guilt and start sharing my thoughts and feelings with whomever cares enough to read them. I have a lot on my mind...
I have successfully transferred to Minneapolis (MSP), but still live in Utah. I hate the commute, which is challenging at best, but I can truly say that I LOVE my job! I love my trips, I love that I hold a line, which in the airline industry equates to freedom, of sorts...I have great pilots and overall, it has been the best move I have made since starting on this journey just over 10 months ago.
One thing I have observed in MSP is that I have yet to fly with a pilot who is older than me! In fact, most of them are young enough to be my sons (and in a few cases, daughters). I even had one First Officer who was 23! Really?!? AND, he was a GREAT pilot! I felt confident and safe in his capable hands. My age has never been so apparent in my life. Don't get me wrong, I am fine with my age and I am very open about it. I just turned 56 and I am happy with my life and all that I have encountered and endured. But flying with all of these young guys has just really brought it all to the surface.
I saw a quote the other day on Pinterest that said something like this:
"Never worry about growing older. Some people never have the chance."
It has been just over 7 months since I lost my daddy. I miss him everyday. As much as I miss him, I am thankful that he is out of his misery and I know that he is free from the bondage of his sickly body. He left a great legacy for us and I was extremely blessed to have had him for 55 years. He will never be forgotten. Through this "loss", I have really seen the importance of cherishing each moment we share with those we love. "Life is very short and there's no time for fussing and fighting my friends..." (I had to add a little Beatles)...BUT, Sir Paul McCartney was absolutely right when he wrote that iconic lyric. I have worked hard to savor life's moments which is oft times a challenge at best!
I have noticed that so many people in the world have lost focus on what's truly important and they tend to focus on what they don't have or seem to have lost, instead of focusing on what they DO have and CAN have if they change their perspective. (Whew...THAT was a long sentence...) I too have fallen into that dirty little trap at times. As life has flowed on, it has become glaringly apparent that no one is immune from trials, sorrows, hardships and pain. It comes in all forms and all sizes. What I find interesting, is that through the darkest moments of my life have come the greatest blessings and opportunities. Life is about learning and growing at all times. When we become stagnant, we start to die. A person without goals is empty.
Well, enough of that...Here's what I'm working towards:
1. Trying to stay focused on my job. Do the best I can at it and be prepared for my recurrent training coming up in June.
2. Be more "service" oriented. Since I'm not home as much as I'd like, I am trying to find ways to serve those I come in contact with everyday.
3. Pay off my American Express card. I am forcing myself to not drop as many trips so that I can make a little extra and pay that sucker off within 3 months.
4. Finding joy in every situation.
5. Trusting in the Lord more than I ever thought I needed to. He has been utterly amazing and blessed me with more tender mercies than I can ever be worty of.
That's just a small sampling of what I want to achieve this year. I am truly grateful for all that has come my way. I have an amazing husband, beautiful children, precious grandchildren and a wonderful mother, brothers and sister + all of their families. Life is short. Life is precious and I don't want to regret any of it.
So, I'm back. I apologize to my patient, humble blog. Thank you for waiting for me and not giving up on me. All of my old posts are still here and new posts are waitingpatiently to be written. And to those few of my followers, I hope you will find me again and please know that I have missed all of you!