Friday, March 12, 2010

Sugar-Free Update

So I have been just 3 weeks Sugar Free. I'm not going to lie, it has been HARD!! Here's the deal...I have cheated! This has been about the hardest thing I have done.

The other day, one of my "littles" had a milkshake. It was chocolate, thick, creamy...I've had these shakes before and they are H.E.A.V.E.N...She was so sweet and offered me a bite. Hey, I didn't want to break a 3 year olds heart, so I oblilged. Then I took another one. And one more. That's it! Three little bites and then it hit...

I got a massive headache that lasted TWO DAYS! I tried to convince myself that the barometric pressure had dropped and that was the reason but there was one problem with that theory...the barometric pressure had actually risen that day. I knew. It was from the sugar!

The good news is that this indicates to me that my body has been cleansed and it is rejecting poison!

OK, that's not the only time I cheated, and yes, I got a headache each time. I did have one triumph! I came home from church last Sunday and was STARVING...I saw an ice cold 7-UP in the back refrigerator and it was screaming my name. I thought about it, I really did...just one little soda wouldn't hurt, BUT, I held on and I resisted...that was a good thing, I'm off soda and have not had even a sip of the bubbly since I started on this journey.

So there you have it. I am trying, I really am. I have a lot more empathy for people with really serious addictions...I mentioned to my son how difficult this has been at times and he said, "Mom, take that and multiply it by 1000...that's a herion addiction!"

That made me really think about how blessed I am that this is my challenge; not drugs or alcohol...It made me respect my sweet boy a bit more for his ability and tenacity work hard at conquering his hideous monster.

So there you have it! I am an addict and I relapsed! It's normal and a part of recovery, but I have new resolve and will keep working on this. I will prevail!


Lynn said...

Good for you for resisting that 7-up!

You are truly on the right track. Keep up the great work!

Donnetta said...

Good for you! You should be so proud of your accomplishments.

Love Being a Nonny said...

Love your perspective. And I love that through it all, you have maintained a relationship with your son. He is blessed. You are blessed. Good luck with the sugar struggle. It is a tough one!